Half Term

So the obligatory I should be working blog post.  I’m back in the library after not coming in for about 12 days.  I wrote last week off for uni work.  I had 4, 5 – 6 hour shifts at work, 2 lectures and took Joel and Esther out to play twice plus Joel had a hospital appointment.  At the beginning of half term Me, Joel and Esther went to Newcastle for the weekend.  Which was fun, tiring and some good but hard conversations. 

Last weekend we went to York on Friday and came back yesterday evening.  I don’t have the energy or time right now to fully overview half term or both weekends.  We went to the Viking museum on Saturday afternoon, as Joel is doing the Viking Museum this half term at school.  Esther wanted to go swimming and Joel wanted to go to the cinema but no one was really willing to take them. 

Saturday and most of Sunday there were 9 of us.  Sunday evening there were 14 of us for dinner and 19 later on.  A combination of aunties, uncles and cousins plus my parents and brothers.  Monday was my Grandma’s funeral.  It was a lovely service and was well attended.  Even though it was my Grandma’s funeral, Everybody who’s anybody in my mother’s life turned out to support her which was really lovely to see.  Joel and Esther went to play with my old youth leader while we went to the crematorium then we picked them up and took them to the after do / lunch at a hotel with us. 

Didn’t enjoy the weekend though, hard work, no fun, felt very unsupported by those that were there.  Supported though by friends who text and messaged me, thank you.  J I can’t be doing with my family or extended family.  No one talks to me, no one’s interested in me.  Some of them say hello and gave me a hug, then didn’t talk to me for the rest of the day / evening.  I’m fed up of being ignored, not fitting in and not feeling wanted or part of the family.  I don’t know why, I have my suspicions that it’s because I’m not rich enough, not posh enough, not girly enough (not bothered about make up or a posh hair do), have no interest in the (upper) middle class bubble that they all live in.  Who knows?!  But I’ve had enough of it. 

Anyway, must try and concentrate, must do some work.  I need to finish my chapter 2 and start my chapter 3.  Word count wise I’ve got anything from 100 – 300 words to write.  In content I need to detail my journal articles a bit more and say more about the research studies.  Hopefully get chapter 2 finished this afternoon.  Anyway, as usual, back to it!